


A Myriad of Love and a Change of Seasons

by ldyvanillacourt



Category: Mystic Messenger (Video Game)
Genre: Acceptance, Angst, Awkward Crush, Baking, Break Up, Crushes, Falling In Love, Falling Out of Love, First Dates, First Kiss, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Friends to Lovers, Holding Hands, Hugs, Implied Sexual Content, Kissing, Love Confessions, M/M, Making Out, Marriage Proposal, Neck Kissing, No Smut, Rejection, Requited Love, Sad and Happy, Sexual Humor, Stargazing, Suggestive Themes, Yooseven Week 2019, but only for like a second, elements of seven’s route, just a lot of making out, spoilers for 707's real name, takes place after jaehee’s route
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-20
Updated: 2019-06-13
Packaged: 2020-01-20 15:51:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 12,560
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18528226
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ldyvanillacourt/pseuds/ldyvanillacourt
Summary: 707 gains a crush on Yoosung for the worse, and falls in love with him for the better.Seven vignettes written for yooseven week.





	1. Firsts

**Author's Note:**

> hi! here’s a collection of my writing for yooseven week!
> 
> if u wanna read the chapters/days in chronological order, they go:
> 
> 3, 1, 2, 4, 5, 7
> 
> day 6 is a bad ending and doesn’t follow the timeline. :)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> for day 1 of yooseven week, the prompt was firsts | lasts. i chose firsts!

“Yoosung, you owe me a kiss!”

He finished tying his apron and smiled as Yoosung turned around at the sound of his name, locking eyes with Seven for a second before glancing down.

_Kiss the cook!_

Yoosung’s expression was blank and he looked back up at him again. Seven moved his hand under the words, displaying the message with a grin. It was a white apron, words in red with a heart to top it off, and the message was right out of his mouth.

Yoosung blinked, seemingly attempting to hold back his smile and failing at it, shaking his head and rolling his eyes.

“I can’t believe you have one of those.”

He turned on his heel to walk to the kitchen before Seven could respond.

/

Of course, he wished he was joking. It would be a lot easier that way.

Instead, it was this way, and he didn’t know how to change it, how to tone down the genuineness of his smile, how to put on a stupid apron and say “Just kidding!” after a spiel of dumb jokes, and mostly how to even consider the idea of kissing Yoosung without feeling lightheaded, his heart fluttering. He cursed at himself every time it happened.

So the best solution to avoiding said embarrassments would probably be to not hang out with Yoosung, but here he was, making a cake with him at his apartment. Which was a perfect opportunity to reach into his kitchen cabinet and pull out that idiotic apron, to wrongly convince himself that it was all just a joke.

They were making a celebratory cake, a “Congrats on the New Coffee Shop, Jaehee and MC!” cake, as Seven dubbed it, watching Yoosung run the knife over it and cover it in a layer of rich, chocolate frosting. He sat at the kitchen table and ignored his increasing heart rate.

“I mean...” Yoosung said, still focusing on the cake, “... that apron, it- it doesn’t even make sense, since we’re baking, not cooking...”

Seven frowned.

Because of course that was the first thing that came to his mind when he saw it.

/

“Seven! You should help me!”

“I’d rather eat the frosting.”

He stood behind Yoosung, reaching forward to touch the frosting on the cake and take some of it onto his finger when Yoosung slapped his hand away. Yoosung grabbed a spatula from the counter, turned around and held it up in a threatening, albeit joking, stance.

“I will fight you,” he said, attempting to stifle his laughter.

Seven defeatedly held his hands up. “You win!” he said, Yoosung lowering the spatula. Seven’s heart fluttered when Yoosung finally let out a laugh.

/

Seven couldn’t help but stare at him, leaning against the wall and watching him, taking in every motion as he frosted the cake, and while he wanted to help, he stayed there with his pounding heart, not wanting to disturb Yoosung’s own little world.

He exhaled, content.

“You look amazing,” he said, voice low and quiet, a smile on his face. Yoosung relaxed his shoulders and put the knife down, a short, breathy laugh escaping his mouth. He looked over at Seven.

“R-really?”

“You always look amazing. And you look really cute in that apron.”

Yoosung glanced down at his apron, smoothing it out, smiling to himself and then back up at Seven, a giggle escaping his mouth.

“Thank you!”

_God._

His heart raced and his head spun.

Yoosung’s eyes averted to Seven’s apron, and he spoke.

“I mean... yours...” He cleared his throat. “... I thought it was a joke, but... I just wanted to be sure. It’s a joke, right?”

Seven blinked.

With that his heart came to an abrupt stop and he felt it skip a beat before continuing. He moved his weight to his feet, no longer leaning against the wall, and locked eyes with Yoosung, who averted his gaze.

“Why do you think I’m always joking?” He narrowed his eyes, forcing Yoosung to look back at him. “Is it because I joke in the messenger? You think I can’t be serious about something, don’t you?”

With that Yoosung’s eyebrows raised and he stepped forward, reaching out to take Seven’s hand. Seven held it behind his back, out of pure impulse.

“Seven, I never said that—”

“But you meant it.”

He was on the verge of tears, realizing such with his voice cracking at his last word, and he hoped it wasn’t too obvious and god, he didn’t want to cry right now. He wished there was no reason for him to cry right now, that he was being an idiot and jumping to conclusions so he didn’t have to cry because of a stupid crush.

“I wish I was joking, Yoosung. I really, really wish I was.”

Still, the words forced themselves out.

“You think I’m just joking about having feelings for you,” he said, “even though I told you. You think I’m just joking about- about all this—” he paused to save himself from the upcoming tears, “-when I told you, I told you that I- I have a crush on you.”

Four seconds of silence. Yoosung gave no response.

But his face was fallen and his eyes were locked on the floor before glancing up at Seven again, deep and holding back tears as well.

Seven, however, smiled.

He smiled, because he had nothing else to do, taking his time to curl his lips upward and pretend his eyes were smiling, too, the fakest, most unreal smile he’d ever given. He kept that smile plastered on his face.

“Never mind!” His voice was happy and joking again. “It doesn’t matter! Let’s just forget about it, hm?”

“Seven...?”

“That’s God Seven to you, Defender of Justice!”

He turned around and walked out of the kitchen without another word.

/

Seven fell onto the couch, letting his body float, feeling light in every limb like he was flying through the clouds, like a bird, soaring above the world. He leaned his head back, resting it on the soft pillow, eyes fluttering closed with exhaustion, and he reached up to rub his temples.

Maybe Yoosung was serious, serious about sharing his feelings, serious about the whole situation, understanding that Seven was the one who held that title. In a perfect world, maybe, but it didn’t really feel that way.

He wished he lived in a perfect world.

Thumping, feet against the floor and making that sound with each step, and he didn’t open his eyes to greet Yoosung. He heard no words from him, no sound of his name. Instead, a warm presence and a weight on the cushion next to him.

He focused on his breathing, controlling it, keeping the tears from falling. Then, words.

“I’m sorry.”

They were hesitant, trembling, quiet words, and Seven almost opened his eyes.

“I’m so, so sorry, Seven.”

Seven crossed his arms out of petty, stupid obstinacy, and he immediately regretted it, finding it easy yet somewhat exhausting to be stubborn and angry at Yoosung when all he heard in that moment was an apology.

“I’m sorry... that I didn’t take you seriously. I know you like me, I know, I- I’m sorry if I made you feel hurt.”

Yoosung sniffed. Seven’s muscles relaxed, sinking more into the couch, seeking at least another form of comfort.

He wanted to be angry at Yoosung. Half of him did. The half of him that didn’t, that half wanted to force his eyes open and kiss him.

A long, long breath from beside him.

“I have a crush on you, too.”

For a second one half of him dominated and his eyes shot open.

Still he wanted to lunge forward and kiss him, but he didn’t move, locking eyes with Yoosung when those familiar words escaped his mouth. “I know,” Seven said. “I know, Yoosung.”

The words lingered in the air.

Seven was somehow able to pull himself up off the couch, almost tripping over his feet, and make his way towards the kitchen again.

“Seven!”

A hand grasping his wrist, stopping him dead in his tracks and pulling him back. He turned, Yoosung’s eyes pleading and desperate for the validation that should result from his apology. Seven could read that from behind the tears.

“Please,” Yoosung said. “Please, don’t ignore my feelings for you.”

“Then don’t ignore mine.”

“I—” He cut himself off, blinking twice, either to hold back the tears or regain his vision to look at Seven. He sighed.

“I’m sorry,” Yoosung repeated. “I like you a lot, and I...” 

He never finished his sentence.

Instead he hugged himself, lip trembling, eyes staring into Seven’s, with his hair slightly out of place. Seven felt his hand move on its own, fingers lightly brushing against Yoosung’s cheek as he carefully pushed the lock of hair out of the way.

He was beautiful.

The words lingered on Seven’s lips, and he attempted to blink away the tears, each thought in his head forcing its way out when they rolled down his cheek.

One hand rested gently against Yoosung’s cheek. With his other hand he reached up under his glasses and wiped his eyes, shaking his head at nothing in particular, a way to get out the emotions coursing through his body, when he was finally able to say something.

“God, I really want to kiss you right now.”

The hand fell when Yoosung’s skin felt like fire against his fingers. He used it to wipe away more tears, adjusting his glasses and looking into Yoosung’s eyes, tears making their way out on his own. Yoosung closed them, breathing in, breathing out, before opening them again.

“Then do it,” Yoosung said, voice not as determined as his statement, though his eyes never left Seven’s. “Kiss me.”

Seven’s heart stopped again, seemingly suffocating for a second at the chance he’d been given, one he’d wanted for god knows how long. One half was screaming at him to pull Yoosung into a kiss, but he took his time, embracing every moment.

With time and care he brought his hands up, hesitantly and without rushing, cupping Yoosung’s cheeks. He glanced down at Yoosung’s lips, back up again, stomach flipping at the thought of what was to come, before leaning forward, tilting his head to the side and kissing him.

He closed his eyes, falling into the hole he’d dug for himself, letting himself give in. It felt... different, in a new, fantastic way and for a second he thought it was the best moment of his life. 

The uneasy yet self-assured _kiss me_ replayed in his head, and it only made him kiss him deeper, lips moving against Yoosung’s and tongue making its way past, feeling lightheaded and body drowning in warmth that flew through his fingertips and made him aware of the once again burning feeling of Yoosung’s skin.

His heart beat rapidly, pounding against his chest, mind spinning with inconceivable thoughts, as if he couldn’t hear them. He felt he was dying, dying in the best way possible.

He exploded at the two hands he felt gently latch themselves onto his arms, lips parting from Yoosung’s with a smack and it finally brought him back to reality.

_What am I doing?_

His eyes shot open.

Without meaning to do so, he pulled his hands away, stepping back and covering his mouth, leaving Yoosung looking dumbfounded, thoughts no longer muddled and coming into light, suddenly feeling cold at the thought of _why the hell did I just do that?!_

He shook his head, as if he was shaking off the thoughts, at the tears threatening to fall again.

He couldn’t.

He couldn’t.

He couldn’t.

“Seven?!”

“I can’t.” His hands darted to grasp his hair with force, not helping his splitting headache. “I can’t, Yoosung. No matter how much I want to, I can’t, I just- I—”

“But I like you...” Yoosung’s face was fallen and his eyes were deep and it struck a cord with Seven, like a punch to the stomach. Yoosung stepped forward, two hands on Seven’s wrists as he pulled them down from his hair, tears in his eyes, a feeling of satisfaction of Yoosung’s hands grasping his.

He let out a sob, and before he knew it Yoosung’s arms flung around his neck and his face was buried in the crook of his neck, Seven wrapping his arms around Yoosung’s waist and pulling him closer into the hug.

The tears fell down Seven’s face and he closed his eyes, crying onto Yoosung’s shoulder.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered, rubbing his hand up and down Yoosung’s back. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have kissed you, I—”

“Don’t be sorry,” Yoosung said, voice shaken. “I like you.”

“You like 707. Not me.”

“I like you. The real you.”

It occurred to Seven that Yoosung didn’t even know his real name, and he said he liked him, the real him; maybe kissing him, telling him how he felt about him, was one way of starting to reveal to him who he truly was.

But...

“I’m sorry,” he repeated, and he wondered if Yoosung was getting sick of it, “if that was your first kiss, and it was w-wasted on me, when I don’t even know if I can- if- if I can do this...” His chest heaved, Yoosung hugging him tighter, letting him melt in his warmth.

“I want to do this,” Yoosung said. “I want to be with you, Seven, w-what else am I supposed to do about my- my feelings for you?”

Seven didn’t know what he’d do, either, feeling his heart slowly fall into Yoosung’s hand, with each and every moment they spent together, falling helplessly, and he knew what he wanted. He’d give anything to have it.

He relaxed his muscles, letting himself be held by Yoosung, feeling his hand grasp the back of his head and fingers run through his hair, as he cried.

“I w-want to- to be with y-you—”

“Shhh, it’s okay...”

_It’s okay, it’s okay, it’s okay._

He let out an exhale, falling into the comfort of the hug and the feeling of Yoosung’s embrace.

/

He wanted Yoosung to be his second kiss, his third, his fourth, and everything after that.

The feeling of grasping Yoosung’s waist, his hands in his hair before falling to rest on his shoulders, and lips against his: it was intoxicating, completely and utterly intoxicating, and he never wanted the feeling to go away.


	2. Stars

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> for day 2 of yooseven week, the prompt was space | stars. i chose stars!

The feeling of driving in a car at night, flying a rocket ship, floating through the dark and endless abyss of space, soaring through stars, a never ending sea of stars: he’d always loved that feeling. The headlights cut through the abyss like a sword and shined with the stars.

One in the morning. He could’ve sworn Yoosung was asleep in the seat next to him until he moved, sitting up straight when the car stopped, exhausted eyes guiding it to its halt, a dangerous trait for a driver.

He faced Yoosung through the darkness, grabbing him by the collar and pulling him forward to kiss him, the night like a deep ocean, floating to the bottom at risk of drowning. He broke the kiss with a smack and spoke against Yoosung’s lips.

“Saeyoung,” he said, words falling and drowning with him.

“Your real name...”

“Saeyoung Choi.”

He placed another kiss upon Yoosung’s lips, a shorter one, relaxing his hand and moving it to run through Yoosung’s hair before resting it against his cheek.

“I wanted to take you to my favorite place to stargaze,” he said, Yoosung giving a tired smile.

The mere warning he’d given Yoosung about where they were going was shaking him awake from their nap on the couch, the movie they’d fallen asleep to still playing on the television, to tell him they were going on an adventure, all due to a sudden yet sleep deprived realization of his.

_“I love looking at the stars.”_

He remembered Yoosung saying that, a twinkle in his eye like the stars themselves, and thought of his own perfect spot.

Yoosung would love it.

He imagined him staring up at the sky, amazed, noticing constellations that Saeyoung had missed, laying under the stars, beautiful.

Right now he was gazing into Yoosung’s eyes and falling into them like he fell into the abyss of the night, falling in a different way.

“I always go here alone, but...” His hand moved to graze Yoosung’s shoulder, voice speaking tenderness into the night, words of euphoria. “... I think I’m falling in love with you.”

Through the darkness he saw tears well in Yoosung’s eyes, voice laced with sobs and breathless whispers. “I love you, too,” he said, yearning in his voice, two hands cupping Saeyoung’s cheeks and pulling him into a another kiss, meeting in the middle.

Saeyoung shifted in his seat, closer to Yoosung, arms wrapping around his waist as they kissed desperately, breaking away every few seconds for breath, Yoosung’s fingers carding through his hair, each motion sending him into an exhilaration and he felt like he could get drunk off of that alone.

Yoosung hummed, sucking on his lip every time he returned for a breathless kiss, Saeyoung’s mind spinning.

He felt like he reached a high and he didn’t want to experience a fall.

/

His phone worked as a flashlight to guide them to the spot on the hill, the spot under the cascading stars that painted the night sky, his own spot that he wanted to share with Yoosung.

The grass tickled his neck, laying down with his vision blurred, an exhausted struggle to keep his eyes open, seeing stars in the nothingness and in the night sky when he finally got his eyes open. The presence of Yoosung laying beside him kept him awake.

Yoosung draped a hand over Saeyoung’s chest, Saeyoung wrapping his arms around him and holding him tight. Yoosung breathed into the crook of his neck and Saeyoung thought he would yawn, laughing quietly.

“Don’t fall asleep on me yet,” he whispered, a rather hypocritical statement, pressing his lips against Yoosung’s hair and kissing him atop his head. “Are you seeing the stars?”

Yoosung shifted, getting a better view of the sky, the ocean of stars and the vast universe, and sighed.

“They’re beautiful,” he said. Saeyoung rubbed his back, hoping he wasn’t coaxing him into falling asleep, words that were lingering on his lips falling out.

“I think about you whenever I look at the stars,” he said. “Stars have always reminded me of you, how much I love you. I wanted to take you here to show you how much you mean to me.”

Yoosung kept staring into the sky, eyes darting from place to place. “You... mean so much to me, too, Saeyoung.”

Saeyoung’s eyes closed on their own, opening them with more effort than the time before. “I want to take you to space,” he whispered, “so we can see stars up close.”

A small laugh. “We’ll probably die if we get too close.”

_We’ll probably die._

He wondered how much more of this he could do, how much more Yoosung can take. He loved him. He wanted to be with him, longer than stars lived, wanted to give him everything, all the love he had to offer.

He wanted to love him like he loved the stars.

_If we get too close._

He was probably, surely, definitely in too deep, letting himself fall more and more in love with Yoosung with each passing day, the stars only reminding him of how much his heart belonged to him. His heart, something valuable, and he told himself he’d never let anyone have it.

He was stupid, he told himself, to put Yoosung in this situation, get him caught up in every disaster that came with his job. Stupid, stupid, stupid, so _fucking_ stupid, and maybe he didn’t even deserve the love Yoosung gave him. In too deep. Way too late.

He wanted to love him like he loved the stars.

“I don’t want to hack anymore.”

He spoke with impulsion and he didn’t know when his eyes started to tear. Yoosung shifted from underneath his arms, glancing up at him.

“Why?”

“Because I want to be with you.”

Silence, silence that lingered in the air and died with a distant star.

“I’m dangerous,” Saeyoung said, letting out the thoughts that chanted in his head.

“I know, but- but I want to—”

“I’m going to make sure we can be together. I’m not going to put you in danger.”

Yoosung was still, staying so only for a few seconds before he cuddled closer to Saeyoung.

He wanted to love him like he loved the stars.

/

“I love you, Yoosung. I love you like all the stars in the sky.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ok so maybe there was some element of space in there but it was mostly stars :)


	3. Confessions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> for day 3 of yooseven week, the prompt was ceremony | confessions. i chose confessions!

“I spy with my little eye... something... purple.”

Yoosung giggled, giving him a joking glare.

“My eyes?”

Seven forced a smile and laughed, running a hand through his hair, anxious and regretful thoughts brewing in his mind.

“Maybe.”

/

They could've been doing better things than playing I Spy in the hallway at the RFA party, especially considering the fact that they were RFA members, who guests wanted to meet, and the game was quickly getting boring.

They’d already spent some time greeting guests before Jaehee and MC ran off to discuss their new business, Jumin was nowhere to be seen and Zen was stolen by his fan club, along with V not being at the party in the first place, leaving Yoosung and Seven all alone.

Seven had a problem and that didn’t really help to solve it.

He leaned against the wall next to Yoosung, crossing his arms out of boredom and glancing from place to place to find something for his turn. Nothing stood out, and the only things that did were already used. An empty, mundane hallway that led to the game becoming dull.

He glanced to the side and locked eyes with Yoosung, bright purple eyes, and the feeling was sent straight to his heart, beating faster, rapidly increasing.

On impulsion he said he saw something purple.

_Shit, shit, shit!_

He felt a low flame in his stomach at the sound of Yoosung’s laugh, and he wanted to crawl into a hole and die.

He decided, in a frivolous version of what he’d always been told as a hacker, that crushes were stupid.

/

“I spy with my little eye... something red!”

_Kill me now._

Seven had a problem and that didn’t really help to solve it.

The problem was he couldn’t even play I Spy with Yoosung without his heart racing and his head spinning, stomach doing a cartwheel, and it was perpetual and annoying and just wouldn’t go away.

He looked over at Yoosung, powering through the feelings to force a half joking smile, Yoosung trying and failing to stifle his laughter. It sent another wave of emotion to engulf Seven and he shook his head, shakily breathing out.

“Is it my hair?”

Yoosung covered his mouth with his hand before pulling it away and speaking through his laughter. “Nope,” he said. “But you’re on the right track. It’s something on you.”

Seven’s palms were sweaty and he was practically shaking, trying to calm himself from the nervousness that came from the repetitive thoughts in his head.

“Is- is it... is it my tie?”

He looked over at Yoosung again, whose eyes averted to his chest and back, glancing at his tie. “Yeah...”

Seven smiled. “So, you were looking at my tie?”

“It-it’s a nice tie!”

Yoosung’s eyes widened before he rolled them, Seven letting out a small laugh. He looked over at Yoosung’s own clothes, his shirt, his bow tie, and felt his heart pound against his chest.

“But I... like your hair, too,” Yoosung said, Seven involuntarily running his fingers through his hair again. His eyes lingered on Yoosung’s for just a second too long and he averted them to a nearby wall.

“I like your eyes,” Seven said, words spilling out without his control and he knew he’d regret it a few seconds later. “They’re nice. They’re bright and they- they make me feel w-warm inside.”

_Dumbass!_

His conscience cursed at him as he desperately tried to fix it, apologies spilling out in a similar manner as before. “Sorry, sorry, sorry.” He covered his mouth and pulled at his hair, wanting to slide down at the wall and curl into a ball. “That was weird.”

Yoosung was still, another second of silence, palpable tension, before a nervous laugh.

“No, it’s okay, Seven, I... thank you.”

_He hates me._

Seven wondered why he let this happen to him, let himself become so utterly infatuated with Yoosung that he even struggled to keep himself in his usual, joking manner.

Of course, he couldn’t control his feelings.

Still, he wondered, with each passing second he thought about Yoosung when he could be thinking about something else, why.

He didn’t wonder why he liked Yoosung; he knew all the reasons he did, constantly listing them off in his head whenever he thought about him. But it was why, exactly, he let his crush take over him this much, that completely baffled him.

/

“Are you happy for Jaehee and MC?”

Yoosung spoke from next to Seven, both sitting on the floor, having gotten tired from standing after ending their game. Seven gently held his knees against his chest and sighed.

“Yep,” he said, smiling. “I don’t think Elly’s mom is though.”

He rolled his head against the wall to look at Yoosung, who sat there crossing his arms over his chest and foot tapping in the air at nothing. He closed his eyes and gave a content smile. “I’m happy for them too.”

“Why’d you ask?”

Yoosung furrowed his brows. “I want a girlfriend.”

Seven always expected this from Yoosung, but it never failed to make his heart skip a beat out of pure, somewhat irrational fear.

“Really? That’s why you asked?” Joking, laughing, to lighten his mood.

“Do you think anyone... likes me?”

It was a sudden question, further than the redundant talk about wanting a girlfriend that usually came from Yoosung, and he opened his eyes to stare into Seven’s. Seven looked away and forward, staring at the wall again, sweating, heart never catching a damn break, wondering how long it’d be until Yoosung would catch on.

At this point, it wasn’t a matter of bravery or courage, and his mind couldn’t call him a coward enough for him to believe that that was the reason why he was afraid to tell him.

He couldn’t tell him.

He couldn’t.

Ever.

“I know someone that does.”

_Fuck._

Could he?

It would definitely be the stupidest, most regrettable thing he’d ever do, but the way Yoosung’s eyes lit up almost killed him.

“Really? Who?”

“Take a guess.”

_Procrastinator._

That could probably be the best way out of it, anyway.

He refused to look at Yoosung, eyes locked on the floor, as he waited for him to make his guess. A low hum from Yoosung, and he wondered if his name had crossed his mind.

“... Well... MC is—”

“It’s not a girl. That’s your one hint. Buy more with in-app purchasing.”

Yoosung blinked. “A guy...? Is it someone in the RFA?”

Seven shrugged, hugging his knees tighter and wondering why he did so. “Can’t tell you. You have no more hints.” He realized he knew the answer to that.

“... Is it someone I know?”

“Beep! Access denied! You’re out of hints!” He smiled to himself, a part of him hoping Yoosung would never guess.

Three solid seconds of silence and contemplation.

“... Zen?”

“Nope.”

If it was a process of elimination then—

“Jumin.”

“Nope.”

Surely at some point Yoosung would have to—

“Is it...?”

“It’s not V.”

_Oh god oh god oh god—_

“Wait... Seven... is it you?”

“Ding ding ding.”

His heart almost exploded.

Seven tapped at his head once, twice, three times, hand shaking, looking to the side at Yoosung, whose eyes were wide, searching for words.

“Seven, you’re—” he let out a breathy laugh, “—you’re joking.”

“I’m not.”

“You have a crush on me.”

“I do. Isn’t that crazy?”

His head was spinning with jumbled thoughts and words that he didn’t want to listen to, feeling like he’d die of a heart attack at any minute, the weight off his shoulders and the relief of getting his feelings for Yoosung off his chest drowned out by the instantaneous regret.

“... No way.”

“You don’t believe me?”

“I d—” Yoosung cut himself off, gesturing at nothing in particular as if it would find him the right words. “I... kinda think you’re just trying to mess with me.”

_Oh._

Seven could see why he’d think that, having joked around in the messenger and put on the face of 707; but it still felt like a slap to the face. He wanted to hug his knees tighter and hold his head down, staying like that forever. Tempting.

Instead, he reached up to rub his temples, pushing his glasses in the process. “It’s n-not a joke.”

“... Are you sure?”

He locked eyes with Yoosung one more time before he spoke.

“Please, even if just this once, take me seriously, Yoosung,” he said, voice pleading and desperate. “Please understand that- that I like you and I have a crush on you, and my feelings for you are completely serious.”

Yoosung held his gaze and stared back at him, face fallen and chest rising and falling with a more rapid breathing.

_He doesn’t feel the same way._

A second wave of overwhelming regret struck Seven, and he found himself rising to his feet, Yoosung’s head moving up, eyes following him.

“W-Where are you going?”

“Bathroom.”

He turned on his heel and left.

/

“Wait, Seven!”

Around the corner, pretending to walk to the bathroom, he heard footsteps running up to find him, growing louder and slowing down until Yoosung was in front of him, stopping him dead in his tracks, catching his breath.

“What?”

“I- I- I have to- to tell—” he gulped, eyes averting to the floor. Seven wondered how long it would take him to just tell him he hated him, never wanted to see him again, that he didn’t return his feelings and that he was straight one more time for memory’s sake. Seven’s mind threw these thoughts at him one by one.

“I- I- I—” Yoosung was shaking, hands tugging at each other out of anxiousness, voice trembling. “I- I think I- I- like-l-like you t-too...”

Initially, another wave, relief instead of regret and it made Seven’s eyes widen for a second, that processing second, before he sighed and let out a laugh, hand running through his hair again, at that point wondering if he had pulled any of it out, a real weight off his shoulders this time. He felt light, the ground beneath them disappearing, floating in the air.

“Thank god!” he wanted to scream, instead whispering it under his breath and covering his mouth out of blissful disbelief.

And he really couldn’t believe it, remembering those anxious thoughts that no longer fazed him, being replaced with elated ones that cried out in joy that _he likes me!_

Looking back at Yoosung’s nervous smile, hands shaking and eyes only locking on Seven’s for a second at a time, happiness flowed through him, more than it had in a long time.

Yoosung was the first to speak after that.

“I... don’t know what to do now.”

The euphoric rush left Seven faster than it came.

Yoosung’s words stuck in his mind and he asked himself that question, suddenly considering each worst case scenario and wondering if he could even have a relationship with Yoosung to begin with, the obvious answer being that they’d both be in danger, and wished he could go back to his moment of bliss.

He fell back down to earth.

“And I... still don’t know if you’re just joking...”

“I’m not,” Seven said, voice growing defensive, and it hit him once again that this was the reality of it all, happy endings and smiles and happiness only a few-second feeling. He wanted to live in that rush.

“I need some time to think about things,” Yoosung said, exhaustion growing in Seven’s muscles.

In that moment, he grew more to believe that maybe he couldn’t be happy with Yoosung, that they’d be stuck in this hell with no way for Seven to fix it, that he’d be left alone knowing Yoosung felt the same way, nothing they could do about it.

Of course, he couldn’t control his feelings.

It was frightening and he’d have to fix it.

He reached up, wiping away the tears forming in his eyes, and nodded.

“I do, too.”


	4. Games

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> for day 4 of yooseven week, the prompt was games | pranks. i chose games!

Eye-straining, electronic blue light illuminated the darkness, darkness from the dead of night, shining from the television screen and keeping tired eyes open, tired minds alert.

Yoosung and Saeyoung spent the majority of their nights at each other’s homes, falling asleep together, waking up together, wishing they could spend every minute together, making each passing moment last. They soon found themselves sleeping later and awaking in each other’s arms at noon, having spent the majority of the night with the blue light causing their eyes to sting.

Three hours since they had started playing a video game on Saeyoung’s pull-out couch, three hours past midnight, keeping each other awake with distracting kisses, attempting to throw the other off from the game’s competition, functioning off soda and potato chips. Three seconds since Yoosung had nearly fallen asleep with his head on Saeyoung’s shoulder after the satisfaction of winning a round, Saeyoung whispering sweet nothings into the darkness, tilting Yoosung’s chin up and kissing him.

Their kisses had become more of a content feeling as days went by and they’d begun to use “boyfriend” on more and more occasions, with less of a nervous rush of adrenaline; yet Saeyoung could still feel the burning passion that came from each deep kiss, as with this one.

The video games were fun, and they were both quite competitive, only adding to the enjoyment; but Saeyoung had always preferred this, kissing Yoosung after each round, growing deeper and deeper until they forgot about the game entirely.

A paused game, a dropped controller and a creaking of the pull-out as Saeyoung wrapped his arm around Yoosung’s waist and pulled him onto his lap, humidity growing in the room, burning, a swim through a sea of hot, hot water.

Still, he pulled Yoosung close, closer each time he returned for the next kiss, hot breath like fire that crackled when the kiss broke. Yoosung’s hands rested on his shoulders, moving to wrap around his neck, Saeyoung feeling his thumbs against his chin, letting out a hum as he slipped his tongue into his mouth.

It was as if the room was shrinking, compressing with the growing heat between them, and Saeyoung could barely breathe after each kiss, as close to Yoosung as seemingly possible.

Thoughts muddled, Saeyoung gently bit Yoosung’s bottom lip, giving a light tug and letting his teeth apply pressure. Yoosung let out a gasp, and when the kiss broke he dropped his head, leaning forward to press his lips against Saeyoung’s neck, as the walls closed in around them.

Rapture, unbelievable passion, coursed through Saeyoung, a feeling he’d always expected to remain foreign to him, excitement joining the array at the thought of experiencing it with Yoosung.

Yoosung’s hands returned to his shoulders, running over his arms, gliding across his chest, and Saeyoung rubbed up and down Yoosung’s back, feeling the tingle of clothes against skin at his fingertips. Hot, wet lips on his neck, teeth nipping at his skin every now and again, a striking feeling sent to Saeyoung’s heart every time.

“Mm, Yoosung—”

Yoosung pushed against his shoulders, and he closed his eyes, letting himself melt into the feeling and fall back onto the pull-out, head resting on a pillow and Yoosung on top of him, still placing open-mouthed kisses to his neck.

A low groan from Saeyoung, and he let Yoosung push closer against him, hands grasping at his waist and mind screaming that he wanted more and god, did he love this. He loved the feeling of his hands on Yoosung in the darkness, moving without a clear view, lips against his, the sound of fire every few seconds. He knew his first kiss with Yoosung was intoxicating, but this...

“I love you.”

Said on impulse, a summary of the thoughts occupying his mind, between broken breaths and the rhapsody of sounds distorted by invigorating feelings, a shaking gasp as he continued. “I- god, I love you so much, Y-Yoosung. You’re beautiful.”

Yoosung’s tongue ran over his skin one more time and Saeyoung almost screamed.

Yoosung’s kisses moved up, trailing on his neck and near his ear, until he was kissing a patch of skin under his earlobe, close enough to speak soft whispers that Saeyoung could hear.

“I want you.”

That was all it took.

Saeyoung’s grip tightened around Yoosung’s waist and he pushed him to the side and off of him, rolling so that he was on top, leaning down to capture his lips in another kiss, an eager, breathless kiss. Yoosung’s hands found his shoulders and he hummed against his lips, moving together and fueling the yearning feeling inside Saeyoung, only reminding him that he wanted him, too, more and more with each moment.

Their kisses were desperate, in a way they’d never felt before, lips locking like it would be their last. Saeyoung was panting for breath yet was eager to stay this way, taking in every part of Yoosung that he could.

A kiss broke. Hesitation. Saeyoung stared down into Yoosung’s pleading eyes.

This time he wished he could see him better in the darkness.

But even without perfect vision, he could see him in an image in his mind, beautiful, radiant, like he always was. Saeyoung wanted to cry tears of joy at the thought that he was his boyfriend, something he used to think would never happen, not in a million years. He treasured every night like this and every second with him.

Saeyoung’s kisses trailed from Yoosung’s lips to his cheek to his neck, burning and passionate again, Yoosung letting out a sigh from underneath him.

“Mm- _aaah,_ Saeyoung—”

“Yes?” Saeyoung spoke against his skin as Yoosung‘s hands moved to tug at his hair, trying to form words between his gasps.

“I’m gonna- I- ah...” Saeyoung placed another kiss to his neck as he spoke. “... t-tear you to shreds in the next round.”

_God, I love this man._

Saeyoung couldn’t help but laugh. His hand glided across Yoosung’s chest as he spoke into his ear.

“So you’re gonna tear me to shreds, you say?”

“W-what?”

Saeyoung’s laugh grew louder, and he pulled back to fall next to Yoosung, covering his face with his hand as he let it out, feeling fully awake at this point, the desperation and eagerness going dormant. Yoosung shifted his position and pulled his hand away.

“What did you mean? What does that mean?”

“I just meant you’d beat me in the game. Like you said. Tear me to shreds.”

He turned his head to face him, and through the darkness he could make out Yoosung’s bewildered expression and widened eyes, causing more laughs to escape his mouth.

“No, but- but you meant it like- like something else!”

“No, I didn’t.”

“Yes! You did!”

Yoosung fell back onto the pull-out, Saeyoung letting out the last of his laughs, ending them with a sigh.

He looked back at Yoosung, hand finding his arm, moving his head to rest it on his shoulder.

“I love you,” he said. “That was... the best experience of my life.”

As quickly as exhaustion left, it returned, Saeyoung’s eyes falling closed without his authorization. He felt a pair of arms wrap around him, a head in the crook of his neck, and was satisfied, rubbing Yoosung’s back.

“You said you wanted me,” Saeyoung whispered, almost to himself, sudden shock at the way that simple phrase caused his desires to surface, a thrilling yet frightening experience.

“I do want you...”

Saeyoung wanted every part of Yoosung Kim, wanted to love him for as long as he could and give him everything he had to offer. Yoosung meant everything to him, the most amazing person he’d ever met, the person he’d fallen in love with, the person he wanted. Needed.

He placed a kiss against Yoosung’s hair.

“You have me, Yoosung. I’m yours. I always will be.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this was 90% them making out oops


	5. Cosplay

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> for day 5 of yooseven week, the prompt was cosplay | conventions. i chose cosplay!

“You two are so cute together!”

Most of Saeyoung was paying attention to the voice on the other end of the line and the sounds of the apparently busy coffee shop, walking at a steady pace, stepping over each crack on the sidewalk for the sake of the habit.

MC’s voice was playing like music in his head, playing to accompany the trip down the sun-kissed sidewalk, a trip too short to take by car. Excitement grew in Saeyoung at the thought of his destination, smiling and looking down at his feet, taking an uncomfortable step to avoid the fictitious consequences of the superstition.

One foot in front of the other, turning a corner, phone to his ear, listening to MC’s elated reaction to his recent declaration of love for Yoosung in the chatroom. It was relieving, the support he received from the RFA members, and MC’s enthusiasm made it all the more satisfying.

He glanced at the rose in hand, twirled it between his fingers, and listened as MC continued.

“You have such a nice friendship,” she said, a quiet clanging and the hum of a coffee brewer in the background, “so Jaehee and I think you’re great together. Since I know how much you love him- ah, I’m just so happy for you!”

“We appreciate it.”

Saeyoung looked up again to avoid bumping into anything, walking under the sun shining in the clear sky, through the city, to Yoosung.

To the first official date they’d ever had, genuine plans they’d made, the ones before being movies or video games at one of their apartments, an endearing and beloved activity, but unlike deciding to meet up for something actually dubbed a date. Saeyoung had been looking forward to it ever since they agreed on where to go.

He made a right turn. Almost there.

“Sounds like you’re pretty busy.”

“Ah, no. Just working quickly. I told Jaehee to take a break.” A soft cough from the other end. “Where are you? Outside?”

“Yep. We’re going on a date soon.”

“Awww!”

He felt heat prickle on his skin from the burning sun, glad that he decided to wear a T-shirt in the warm summer weather. He kept his mind on his destination, imagining meeting Yoosung there, the scene playing out in his head, and pressed on, passing nearby walkers.

“You two have fun on your date!” she said, voice kind and sweet. As he rounded another corner to the park, he found his lips turning up into a smile.

He imagined Yoosung’s own when he’d see him.

“Thanks, MC.”

“See you later!”

A beep.

Irrational nervousness.

A consideration of the fact that, technically, he’d never been on a date before, but with Yoosung, it was a good start.

/

The trees cast a relieving shade across the park, over the field of grass and flowers, leaving shadows, temporary imprints, on the walkway. Yoosung sat on a bench under the cool wave of shade, locking eyes with Saeyoung from the other end of the walkway, face lighting up.

Saeyoung made his way to him, walking at a faster pace, hiding the rose behind his back. Yoosung stood from his seat, moving slowly to meet Saeyoung before the middle, drawing closer.

“Hey!” Yoosung’s greeting.

Saeyoung’s greeting came when they were close enough to touch, wrapping his arms around Yoosung and pulling him into a hug, careful to hold the rose behind him, smiling into the crook of his neck. Yoosung froze for a second before reciprocating, throwing his arms around Saeyoung’s neck and hugging him back.

Saeyoung fell into Yoosung’s warmth, warmth like the beating sun that lit the sky and sent its rays to the world around him, sweat trickling down his brow and the hug growing humid.

Five seconds.

The humidity grew uncomfortable, the hug increasingly overheated, but he only pulled away with the hug’s natural end and swung the flower forward from behind Yoosung’s back, offering it to him with a grin.

“For you!”

He tried to stifle his laughter and save the situation from the nervousness he beat down to the back of his mind. His hand shook slightly with the rose between his fingers.

_God, stop being—_

Yoosung’s smile was bright as he reached out to take the thornless rose, fingers lightly brushing against Saeyoung’s as he did so, sending a surge of happiness, a burst of nervousness, through Saeyoung. It made him feel like he did with his stupid, awkward crush, or that floating, euphoric feeling that had been replaced with content ones.

And it was brought upon him by the way Yoosung accepted the flower, bringing it to his nose and breathing in the scent, looking back up at Saeyoung.

“I love it.”

“Really? Oh, thank god. I was wondering if you even like flowers or—”

“I’d like any gift from you, Saeyoung.”

“—I just thought it’d be nice to get you something and I didn’t know if—”

Yoosung placed two fingers under Saeyoung’s chin, turning his head forward to face him, and leaned in to place a kiss on his cheek, lingering for a second. Saeyoung’s face was flushed, from the kiss and from the warm weather. When Yoosung pulled away, he let out his laughter, hands shaking.

_Why are you so—?_

“Are you nervous?” Yoosung asked, his expression worrisome, and Saeyoung mentally cursed to himself that he ruined their date, hands moving on their own to adjust his glasses.

“Kinda,” he admitted.

“I’m sorry if I made you—”

“You didn’t do anything wrong. This is just... a step forward for us.”

Yoosung processed that for a second, lips moving up into a smile. He glanced down to Saeyoung’s hand and reached out to take it, stepping back and pulling Saeyoung with him in a way that he couldn’t help but smile, too.

“I guess since it’s been months since we started dating, this is kinda late for a first date,” Yoosung joked, and the two fell into step and made their way down the walkway and through the park.

/

“Yoosung, is it really considered ‘dating’ if we’ve never been on a date until now?”

“Nope. We lost all our progress.”

“Dammit!”

Saeyoung lifted their hands up, bringing Yoosung’s to his lips and kissing his palm.

“I told you to save the game at our last checkpoint, Yoosung!”

/

The sun was a blinding light within branches, its rays overtaken by the shade cast upon the cement by the growing amount of trees in the park, Yoosung and Saeyoung’s connected hands swinging slightly as they walked.

They spoke happily with each other about whatever came up, Saeyoung finishing a conversation about Yoosung’s new job at Jumin’s company with a joke, Yoosung’s laugh ending with a sigh, a silence between the two of them that sat comfortably, yet with a feeling that there was a hole that needed to be filled.

Saeyoung inhaled, breathing in the cleared air from the coolness of the shade. He blinked for a second too long before opening his eyes again, listening to an initiation of discussion.

“You know... I actually don’t mind just... watching movies with you.”

Yoosung’s voice was small and hesitant, and his grip tightened in Saeyoung’s hand for a second before loosening. “This date is really nice,” he continued, “but don’t think we can’t just stay home for our dates. They’re the same either way, ‘cause we’re together.”

Saeyoung thought about that.

He loved Yoosung, loved spending time with Yoosung, whether it be at home or in a park or anywhere. He wouldn’t rather be on a date with anyone else, taking in every sensation that came from holding Yoosung’s hand and being with him in the moment.

When he first realized he had a crush on Yoosung, he didn’t think he’d get this far. He didn’t think he’d ever get to call him his boyfriend, and could never see the two of them on a date.

When he first realized he’d fallen in love with Yoosung, he wanted to cherish every moment with him, hold him in his arms and live in that love forever.

He looked over to Yoosung, eyes locking onto his, the nervousness returning and flowing through his body, the realization hitting him like a train.

His heart rate increased, thoughts flooding his mind, completely taking over him, and his grip tightened as his hand began to shake again, hoping that Yoosung’s wouldn’t be alarmed; but in that moment, he knew the exact reason behind his nervousness.

Yoosung’s eyes were bottomless pits to Saeyoung as he let go of his hand and changed the subject.

“I wonder what I’d look like wearing your glasses.”

Saeyoung involuntarily reached up to adjust his glasses, letting out another laugh, and slipped them off his face, thoughts still muddled, actions done in a half-minded manner like he was in a dream. He smiled as Yoosung took the glasses from his hands and put them on, blinking four times.

“Everything is so blurry!”

“I love you.”

It was random, said through laughter and a dumb smile, but it was a way for Saeyoung to express the thoughts in his head, more ideas being thrown at him every time he looked at Yoosung, who blinked again, letting out his own laughter.

“I love you, too. Why’d you...?”

“I just...” He felt light, like his feet were lifted off the ground, lightheaded and flying through the air, brought back down to earth to look into Yoosung’s eyes, vision blurry, but still enough to see his inquiring look, and made a tentative decision in his head. He sighed to finish his sentence.

He became aware of the hands on his cheeks and Yoosung’s soft whispers, Saeyoung’s arms moving to hold his waist.

“I love you,” he said, a small smile on his face, and Saeyoung had never kissed anyone with glasses before, but he wondered if this was how Yoosung felt when they kissed regularly.

The tentative decision floated in Saeyoung’s mind, hitting every corner, and he processed it, thought it over, and broke the kiss with a smile, having fully made his decision and stressed a feeling he’d felt before.

He wanted to cherish every moment with him.

He wanted to hold him in his arms.

He wanted to live in that love forever, and fall for him all over again with each passing day, for the rest of his life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it’s not rly cosplay but yoosung wore saeyoung’s glasses so it counts


	6. Bad Ending

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> game over - bad ending

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> for day 6 of yooseven week, the prompt was future | good/bad end. day 6 will be a bad ending and day 7 will be a good ending!

Saeyoung could feel the familiarity in the scenery, laying under a canvas painted with darkness and the sea of stars cascading across the sky, the cool breeze of midnight summer grazing his skin. But there was an unfamiliarity, the annoying wet grass from the day’s rainfall soaking his clothes. He pulled Yoosung against his chest, a striking, fearsome dissatisfaction hitting him as the question fell out of his mouth.

“Will you marry me?”

_Exacerbate._

Saeyoung had made mistake after mistake and it all came rushing back to him in the worst possible moment.

He felt a sharp, stabbing pain in his chest, heart beating faster and faster in another unfamiliarity at the way Yoosung tensed up in his arms and pulled away from him to sit up straight, hands covering his face, rubbing his temples. Aggravation, obvious to Saeyoung.

_Fuck!_

Regret came instantaneously, growing and growing and growing with each passing second he let the question linger in the air, and Saeyoung was falling down a bottomless pit, down into nothingness, the deepest depths of his mind.

“Saeyoung, I—”

“Please.”

“I’m—”

_“Please.”_

He was throwing a rope to the top of the pit, hoping someone, something, _anything_ , would catch it, pull him up, and let him climb to the surface, to safety, to his right mind. A completely and hopelessly futile attempt, and with each throw, he only fell faster, deeper, never-ending.

Saeyoung lifted his back off the grass and sat up in desperation.

“Yoosung.”

He put his arms around Yoosung again, who shook underneath his touch, letting out an uneasy breath and wiped his eyes before moving his hands away from his face, tears falling onto Saeyoung’s shirt as he rested his head on his shoulder.

“I love you.” A yearning, pleading tone to his voice. “I want to marry you.”

Yoosung gave no response.

What he did give was five seconds of silence that was enough for a tiny, useless spark of hope to alight in Saeyoung, five seconds for him to believe that maybe, just _maybe—_

“I can’t.”

The flame went out.

Yoosung pulled himself forward and out of Saeyoung’s grasp, hugging his knees, the sentence striking Saeyoung and leaving him immobile, and to his desperate pleas, his thoughts shifted.

Saeyoung’s mind was running in a tug-of-war between the half of him that regretted this, expected this reaction from Yoosung, and the idiotic impulsion, the half that had taken over and was _still_ hopelessly in love with Yoosung, the half that made him ask that stupid fucking question, the half trying to convince the other that he could never crawl out of that hole.

God, he was in too deep. He wanted this, _fuck_ , he wanted this, more than he’d ever wanted anything. He wanted to spend the rest of his life with Yoosung and wake up next to him every morning and—

_Do I really want this?_

“Do we really love each other?”

_What?!_

Saeyoung had made mistake after mistake and it all came rushing back to him in the worst possible moment.

_No, stop, don’t say that, how could I not love him?!_

Why did he ask that question if he didn’t love him?

He slouched his shoulders and ran a hand through his hair, exhaustion overcoming him, accompanied by annoyance and frustration, making him doubt himself and the flame of hope and the _please_ , over and over again. He rethought every decision he’d made and re-evaluated every thought in his head.

“I don’t... I don’t know anymore, Saeyoung...”

Tears formed in his eyes and he wanted to scream, mostly at himself, after he threw away all his re-evaluations and doubts, one half of him once again taking over.

_No._

_No._

_I love him._

_I love him like all the stars in the sky._

Doubt. Doubt. Doubt.

_Liar, liar, pants on fire._

“I don’t know either...”

_Do I really love him?_

“... but I want to love you.”

Silence came and stayed for a few seconds too long, enough time for Saeyoung to worry Yoosung truly didn’t love him the way he did, the way he tried to convince himself he did.

Yoosung turned to face him and leaned his head against his knees, hugging them tighter, letting out a sigh. Saeyoung waited, fearfully anticipating his response.

“I’m... scared.”

Yoosung’s voice was hesitant and he held back tears, tears that spilled into his voice and left it croaky. “I’m just confused, I- we- I used to- I don’t want to stop loving you.”

“You’re...?”

“I’m afraid b-because I don’t know if I... love you like I used to...”

_Do I really—?_

The thought struck Saeyoung again and he knew he was afraid of it, too, afraid of the time spent falling in love with Yoosung being left in the past, after always telling himself that Yoosung would be his present. It was terrifying, the way it entered his mind and stuck there and refused to leave, sending fear through Saeyoung whenever it made its presence known.

_I love him._

“Then let’s keep loving each other like we used to.”

He needed to.

He was frightened at where he’d be if he didn’t, if he stopped loving Yoosung after all this time, a horrible, horrible possibility coming to his mind that he immediately pushed back into, hopefully, nonexistence.

He held his gaze, eyes never leaving Yoosung’s, and watched as he let go of his legs and reached up to wipe his eyes, nodding his head, voice pleading and desperate.

“I really want to k-kiss you right now.”

_I want this, I need this—_

He closed his eyes. Breathed in. Breathed out. Opened them again.

“Do it, _please_.” He tried not to let his voice tremble, though tears formed in his eyes and it was almost painful to hold them back. “Kiss me.”

Without hesitation, two hands cupped Saeyoung’s face, and he leaned toward Yoosung on instinct, meeting him in the middle. He expected a wave of satisfaction to overcome him when they kissed, but his stomach turned in annoyance, and something, some unknown aspect of the kiss, felt _wrong._

Their lips parted for just a second, and Saeyoung caught his breath, telling himself that he _needed_ this, returning eagerly for the next kiss.

They stayed under the stars for not too long after, and with each kiss that didn’t sit right, he better understood the change in them, and the annoyance that left a hole in his heart from the way their kisses felt.

/

Empty.

Devoid of any emotion they’d felt before, what used to be.

Saeyoung rued the day his kisses with Yoosung became empty.

In desperation he tried to invoke those same feelings from kissing Yoosung before.

His breathing was heavy and his hands were moving on their own, pushing and pulling against Yoosung as he sat in his lap, tugging at Saeyoung’s hair. They’d run back to Saeyoung’s apartment, a small lamp in the bedroom their only illumination, the bed sinking slightly beneath them.

Pathetic passion did nothing against the emptiness, and it was different, in the worst way, as if he could be kissing any other person.

_I love him._

_I love him._

_I love him._

_I want to marry him._

He’d convinced himself, convinced himself, done nothing but convince himself for so long, and there’d been no effort to it, but now he repeated and repeated the words in his head to push back the doubts.

Empty.

But when he pushed closer to Yoosung, a new, pulsating feeling hit him, filling the emptiness and _oh my god_ , that feeling was different, in the best way.

It took over him every time he grasped Yoosung’s waist and pulled him forward, deepening their kiss, moving in their own rhythm. Yoosung broke the kiss and gasped for air, letting out a groan before returning.

Saeyoung’s heart banged against his chest, the new feeling sending straight to his brain, exhilaration overcoming him, his stomach flipping.

An intense, nauseating feeling, almost painful, flowing through him and the space between them, the air growing heavy as his body pushed against Yoosung’s with another pull forward, another intoxicating smack of lips, another wave of the new emotion.

Another sense of lacking of the old ones.

But Saeyoung was eagerly digging a hole into the ground, throwing dirt into the endless pit, the satisfaction hitting him in this new feeling. Though the hole could never be filled: a bottomless pit will go down and down until the end of time, making the filling useless.

And so the pit stayed, a void of nothingness.

Saeyoung hated that void.

He kept trying to fill it, no matter how futile it may be, drunk on the satisfaction, high on the new, false feeling that the hole was a little more filled, a little less empty, capable of being saved, with each throw of dirt.

His mind was drowning in an ocean of that feeling, falling deeper with every touch, every movement.

Saeyoung loved that feeling.

He loved to tell himself that the void was filled, the pit was finite, the abyss was savable, and the new feeling, the burst of ecstasy was love, love, _love, I love him, I love him, please, god, please-_

The current came and carried him to deep sea, his reaction coming in a broken gasp against Yoosung’s lips, a grunt of his name. Amid the hot water of the sea, _fuck_ , his body was on _fire_ , and Yoosung’s hands moving from his hair to pull at his shirt only fanned the flame.

“God, Yoosung...”

_I love him._

But the feeling that overcame him when his shirt was over his head and onto the floor was still a desperate product of their attempts to awaken the feelings they’d felt before.

_No._

_I love him._

Denial. Denial. Denial.

_I love him._

He repeated and repeated and repeated the same three words, playing in his head like a broken record, as Yoosung pushed him onto the bed, laying his back on the comforter. He sucked in a breath before Yoosung leaned over him to kiss him again, pushing closer, on top of him.

The feeling struck him again, and his mind was sent into a state of such euphoria that for a moment his convincing was needless, and all he could think about was Yoosung’s kisses moving from his lips to his neck to his chest.

Yoosung pinned Saeyoung’s arms onto the bed as he kissed a heated trail down his chest, the barrier of humidity between them leaving Saeyoung breathlessly panting Yoosung’s name, heartbeat growing quicker and quicker, the new feeling erupting, exploding, flowing through Saeyoung.

His mind screamed that this, the explosion of the best feeling he’d ever experienced, was what he’d felt with Yoosung before, and he basked in the glory his head gave him that he was finally able to bring it back.

He loved Yoosung. He never wanted to stop loving Yoosung.

He flew in the air, floated in the emotion, for as long as he could, before his mind settled down, falling from his great height.

/

The heat from the sheets and blankets of the bed prickled at his skin, covered in a thin layer of sweat that bugged him whenever he thought about it, Yoosung’s weight pressed against his chest growing more and more annoying with each second that passed. He wouldn’t be able to fall asleep like this.

Yoosung’s arm draped over his chest and his skin was burning at their touch. He felt Yoosung shift his position every few seconds, and his arms wrapped around him, uncomfortably laying with him after his fall from the euphoria.

“We’re so fucking stupid, Yoosung.”

No matter how many times he tried to throw a rope to the top of the pit, fill it, anything: he’d always end up back in this same position, falling down and down into nothing.

“I feel- god, I feel so selfish...”

He realized the uselessness behind trying to stop his fall, fill the pit, the thought of succeeding at it so appealing to him that he’d kept up his attempts.

“I’m sorry.”

“Saeyoung.”

A soft whisper from Yoosung, and a coldness hit his skin as he shifted again, out of Saeyoung’s arms, rolling to the side for his head to fall onto a pillow, hands covering his eyes.

“I’m the one who should feel selfish right now.”

“No, I wanted us to—”

“Keep loving each other like we used to.” Yoosung’s hands fell from his face and onto the covers. “I wanted that too, Saeyoung, p-please don’t blame yourself.”

Saeyoung was silent.

“This is just... so... unhealthy.” Yoosung’s words replayed in Saeyoung’s head when he spoke, never turning to look each other in the eye. “I w-want to love you, I really do, but- but I don’t know if I- if I can anymore...”

Saeyoung almost didn’t recognize the words when they came back to his mind.

_I love him._

_I love you, I love you, I still love you—_

They failed to make it past his lips, and for that reason he felt like crying.

He never thought he’d see the day he couldn’t tell Yoosung he loved him.

“... we can’t just force this thing, Saeyoung, y-you don’t deserve to be loved like that. It’s fake.”

_Fake._

Even if Saeyoung could say it, tell him he loved him, he couldn’t say it a million times for him to believe it was true.

This was it, the fall from the high burst of the new feeling that suddenly seemed so dead to him, leaving him worn out and wondering if it was worth it that he even tried. 

_I don’t love him._

“B-but I don’t want to let you go.”

“... I wish it wasn’t like this, Saeyoung, I just- I d-don’t want to leave you either.”

But the coldness that had hit Saeyoung was still on his skin, on the bed, everywhere he could feel, from the distance between him and Yoosung, and the words that hid in his mind, behind his lips, prompted new words to fall out.

“I hate that this is what’s best for the both of us.”

He let the words float in the air for a second before shifting to lay on his side, reaching out to turn off the lamp on the nightstand and wondered where he’d thrown his glasses, dismissing that thought and any other as he closed his eyes. “You can stay here tonight.”

“Saeyoung—”

“Go to sleep.”

“I miss you.”

He said nothing.

The coldness grew.

He heard sheets shifting before settling, the room quiet and still, and it was as if he was sleeping alone.

/

He reconsidered his possibility.

He didn’t know when he started to fall out of love with Yoosung, but that night, after all his attempts to diminish it, was when he realized.

Of course, he couldn’t control his feelings.

707 had made mistake after mistake and it all came rushing back to him in the worst possible moment.


	7. Good Ending

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> game over - good ending

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> for day 7 of yooseven week, the prompt was free day. this will be a good ending!

He wanted to cherish every moment with him.

He wanted to hold him in his arms.

He wanted to live in that love forever, and fall for him all over again with each passing day, for the rest of his life.

Saeyoung’s decision was crucial, and at that point he had fully made up his mind.

/

Repeating, repeating, repeating the four words in his head, eyes able to stay open from the excitement that came when he anticipated the situation, while he parked his car at the familiar hill under the familiar canvas painted with stars. He unbuckled his seatbelt and pushed the car door open before Yoosung could ask why he was smiling so much.

He closed his eyes and let out a sigh before opening them and taking in the scenery, the stars glowing against the sky, and the place he used to call his own, a place that now only made him think of Yoosung.

He looked up to the array of stars, and he was floating, his feet lifting off the ground and taking him to outer space, where he could be lost in those four words every second and shine in the darkness like the stars.

Saeyoung’s decision was crucial, and at that point he had fully made up his mind.

The sound of a car door slamming shut, footsteps towards him, one arm around his shoulder and pulling him into a side hug, bringing him back to reality, back down to earth. He laughed as another arm wrapped around his neck, and he hugged Yoosung’s waist, listening as Yoosung spoke between laughs into his ear.

“I dare you to carry me to the top.”

“Is that the only reason why you hugged me?”

“No!” Yoosung laughed again, tightening his hold around Saeyoung. “I love you, but my legs are tired.”

 _“I’m_ tired,” he said, and the new round of laughter that came with it only made him fly higher, floating on the surface of an ocean, through all the waves, with Yoosung. He wanted this feeling to overcome him with every second they spent together, the most overwhelmingly beautiful and golden feeling he’d ever experienced.

“Then I’ll race you to the top.”

“Oh my god, Yoosung.”

Yoosung pulled away and began to walk backwards, hugging himself, laughter too much to contain. Saeyoung smiled, rubbing his temples in mock aggravation. “You literally just said your legs were tired.” He ended his sentence with another breathy laugh.

“I’m still gonna win.”

“I will fight you.”

This, the joking, the laughter, filled him with more happiness than his past jokes ever could, and he felt like he could fly out of the ocean and walk on the water, the shining sun guiding his way across the sea.

“Then you better not let me get a head start, Saeyoung.”

With Saeyoung’s blink, Yoosung was gone, starting his journey up the hill, and Saeyoung smiled at the competition his boyfriend set, legs moving on their own to catch up to him.

He powered through the exhaustion in an attempt to win the race, moving with the elation from the thought of what was to come when they reached the top of the hill.

/

Saeyoung ran.

He ran without knowing how long he could keep it up, how long before exhaustion took over him. Each step up the hill was another closer to the stars, that high, heavenly feeling of flying through space and floating on water. He pushed himself over his limit, falling to his knees when he reached the top, two seconds behind Yoosung, and let himself collapse onto the dry grass and lay on his back.

His chest rose and fell with each heavy, exhausted breath, eyes locked on the stars above him, shining in every corner of his eye.

Yoosung fell next to him. Saeyoung rolled his head to the side to look at him, and focused on his smile, his voice happy, joking, yet breathless.

“I win.”

“Congratulations. You get...” he took in a long breath, still panting in exhaustion from the run. “... a prize.”

“What’s my prize?”

“It’ll arrive... in five to ten business days.”

Yoosung let out a contagious laugh, leaving the both of them gasping for air before Saeyoung let his eyes fall shut, feeling his heart finally beat normally. He opened his eyes and moved his head to stare back up at the sky.

The silence sat between them, filling the air, before Saeyoung heard Yoosung’s voice take over.

“I love looking at the stars.”

Yoosung’s hand found Saeyoung’s.

Saeyoung rolled his head to the side again, having done it enough times that his neck was starting to hurt, and glanced down at Yoosung’s hand over his, noticing the glimmer in his eyes. Yoosung shifted closer to him, and he moved to wrap both arms around him, laying in that familiar position.

Saeyoung’s decision was crucial, and at that point he had fully made up his mind.

He repeated it in his head and he knew he was sure of it, because of the way that feeling was brought up again, and it was as if he was flying when he kissed the top of Yoosung’s head. It was _different_ , in ways he couldn’t comprehend, and he pondered on it in silence.

He closed his eyes and rubbed Yoosung’s back, taking note of the way Yoosung’s clothes felt against his skin, his warmth pressed against his chest. The sensation sent his mind running again.

He focused on a single constellation and said the first thing that came to his mind.

“You’re just like the stars.”

Yoosung hummed. “I am?”

“But you’re brighter than stars, and you’re... so close to me.”

_We’ll probably die if we get too close._

He thought back to those fears, the anxiousness from falling in love with Yoosung and the hacking, god, that fake persona, the wall he’d built. The joking and laughter, the ones before Yoosung stole his heart, were all connected back to 707. But when he was with Yoosung, driving to the hill and laughing too much, he was sent up towards the sky and he was...

He was himself.

_My name is Saeyoung Choi._

“You make me feel... like I can be Saeyoung.”

_This is real._

It was different, different, different, _real, amazing, perfect._

The thought brought a smile to his face.

Yoosung tightened his grip around Saeyoung’s chest, cuddling closer to him, and he spoke in whispers that Saeyoung could barely hear.

“You can always be Saeyoung,” he said. “You don’t have to be anyone else with me.”

Saeyoung took that in, remembering his notorious old facade and the thought that he _had_ to be someone else, anyone else, for safety, protection from the dangers of his past job. Months and months ago, even a consideration of telling an RFA member his real name would’ve made him terrified.

_Saeyoung Choi._

“I love you for who you are.”

He was Saeyoung, and he was satisfied with Yoosung knowing that, making him feel like he can be nothing but himself.

“You’re so beautiful when you’re _you_ , Saeyoung.”

“This... this is real...”

“You deserve to be loved like that.” Yoosung’s voice was like a soft melody to send him to sleep. “It’s real.”

_Real._

Yoosung went quiet.

But his words that stayed in the air reinforced Saeyoung’s decision, and his heart beat quicker when the question, along with nervousness, resurfaced. He smiled, moving his hand to run his fingers through Yoosung’s hair, the words falling out.

The way he loved Yoosung was _real._

“Will you marry me?”

He wanted to live in that love forever, and fall for him all over again with each passing day, for the rest of his life.

/

Saeyoung’s head was spinning and his thoughts were blurred when Yoosung immediately sat up in response to his question, hands covering his face, sobs muffled. Saeyoung found himself sitting up, too, given only a second before Yoosung turned towards him and pulled him into a hug, crying into his shoulder.

Tears fell out of Saeyoung’s own eyes, and he hugged Yoosung back, arms tight around his waist.

“S-Saeyoung—”

He was shaking as he gasped for air, his breathing uncontrolled, and Saeyoung hugged him tighter and calmed him down, head pounding as he heard Yoosung’s response.

“Y-yes... yes, _yes_ , I- I’m in love with you, that’s all- that’s all I’ve- I’ve ever—”

“Shhh, it’s okay...”

_It’s okay, it’s okay, it’s okay._

“I love you, Yoosung.”

_He said yes._

“I love you like all the stars in the sky.”

_He said yes!_

/

Saeyoung wanted to love Yoosung forever, live in a love that was amazing and beautiful and real, and Yoosung accepted.

He gained a crush on him for the worse, and fell in love with him for the better, the fears of that past crush taken over by the love the two shared, the love Saeyoung never thought he’d experience, now with him for the rest of his life.

He wouldn’t rather do this with anyone but Yoosung.

The thought of spending every moment with him, as his _husband_ , sent Saeyoung flying again, higher than the stars.

He was so, so happy, happier than he’d ever been, and more in love with Yoosung in that moment than any other.

Saeyoung’s decision was crucial, and the myriad of love he had with Yoosung could melt winter snow, and bring summer days.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i’d like to thank the wonderful people who created this event about two months ago, @yoo7week on tumblr, and everyone who read and helped out w this story! when i started this in april, i was so excited to see what this fic would be like by day 7, since i knew i’d get carried away, and i’m so proud to be here writing this note!
> 
> i hope u enjoyed this fic, and have a great day!

**Author's Note:**

> thank u for reading!
> 
> tumblr: bisexualray  
> 


End file.
